Hillary’s email kerfuffle.
Donald Trump’s hair comb-over.
Is Bernie really a socialist . . . or even a Commie? Oh my God, a COMMIE!!!!
And speaking of “oh my God”, Oh my God . . . Melania was a . . . nude model – how . . . how . . . outrageous.
But we all know what Bill did (tee…hee…hee) . . . how could Hillary have stayed with him?
And speaking of “God”, who believes in God the most?
And what are we going to do about people who don’t believe in God the way I do? (Let’s kick them out, they’re not really Americans.)
Why doesn’t Bernie just concede for the good of the party?
How could anybody in their right mind even consider voting for . . . <the name of your most despised candidate goes here.>
No matter what [HE] [SHE] does, I will defend <my chosen candidate> till election do us part.
It doesn’t matter that Hillary is on the payroll of the Oligarchy, she’s a liberal.
It doesn’t matter that Trump is a wannabe cog in the Oligarchy . . . he’s a Republican – that means he’s for America!!!!
I support Hillary because she’s for the little people. Pay no attention to that banker behind the curtain. (Toto! Stop biting his ankles! Shame on you!)
I support Trump because he’s going to change things . . . even though he clearly hasn’t got a clue about how anything works. (But he’s a wiz of a wiz if ever a wiz there was.)
If Bernie isn’t nominated I’m gonna vote for someone who has less chance of winning the election than I have of hitting the Powerball jackpot (Out of principle, ’cause I really don’t care about reality.)
Hillary is a liar.
Trump is a liar.
Bernie is unrealistic.
The system is rigged against <my candidate>
The problem is those damned <liberals, conservatives, democrats, republicans, greens, libertarians, gays, Muslims, Mexicans, foreigners, transgenders, atheists>
We’re talking about stupid shit, people . . .
REALLY STUPID SHIT.
It’s time to change the conversation.
How do we start?